They Say Einstein was Smart, but I Think He Just Knew How to Use Google

Last weekend I went and faced my arch-nemesis, which is also named the PRAXIS. (This is not to be confused with my other people/ things I have proclaimed to be my arch-nemeses in the past, such as the person that installed a lock on the neighboring apartment complex's swimming pool without giving me a key, or the innocent ticket taker at the movies who informed my best friend Cami and me that no, we can not take a gigantic pizza into the movie theater.) The PRAXIS is a teacher licensing test, and passing it is necessary to graduate. I signed up to take it in April, bought a book, and started studying. I took a bunch of practice tests, and all these tests taught me some very important things. Arguably the most important thing I learned was this: TESTS ARE SUPER BORING. (Sidenote: my writing professor in college one time told me that you should basically never write sentences in capital letters, like what I just did. But honestly, do you really feel any emotion at all if you don't feel it in capital letters? For her sake, I hope she is never next to a house that is being engulfed in flames, because she would probably say in a very calm voice, "Please, someone call 911. Also, Rachel, please stop banging your head against the wall every time I make your rewrite that essay.")

Anyway, I put in some study time in early May, and then my work started getting really busy. One of my many talents is lying to myself and actually believing it, so when I told myself, "I'll study on the weekends" I actually thought this would happen. I'm not sure what happened next, but I firmly believe that I accidentally stepped into a time warp of sorts, because all of a sudden it was the night before the PRAXIS and I still wasn't even sure what PRAXIS stood for. My first solution to this problem was to watch some tv, and when that didn't solve the problem, I took a short nap. Now that the evening was almost over, I decided that maybe it would be a good idea to crack open my study book. As I reviewed the material, I realized there was a lot of stuff I was supposed to know. A smart person would crack down and start studying. An even smarter person, however, would use their resources. 

My roommate, Emmie, always laughs because of my obsession of Google. I need directions somewhere? I can't remember what time the library opens? My new roommate informed me that she used to live in Azerbaijan, and I wanted to pretend like I'd actually heard of that place? Google it! Many of my life's questions are answered through a click of a button. Except for my question about Azerbaijan....but that was because I spelled it Azerbaiqoiwej,mvnljgoijewlakdjfs and apparently not even Google is that smart.  

I figured that Google would save the day again, so I began typing in any topic that happened to be on the test. As the night grew later, my searches began to get more and more desperate:

It turns out my Google searches paid off, because the next morning I went and passed the test. Certainly the hardest part of the test was even before the test started, and I was required to write a paragraph in cursive. IN CURSIVE, FOLKS. I'm fairly certain the last time I used cursive was when I decided I was the Greek queen during social studies in sixth grade and I wrote down commands for my loyal subjects. 

Good thing if I ever have to teach cursive, I can just Google it.